If your sexless marriage is causing you great concern, you may think that the problem is insurmountable and looking around for marriage counselor or a divorce lawyer seems inevitable but this is not always the case. A lack of sexual intimacy is a factor in many failing marriages and finding a solution may not be easy. It will require a great deal of thought before you take the step of seeing a marriage counselor or a divorce lawyer.

Effects of a sexless marriage:

• It can make you feel unwanted and therefore very lonely.
• It can cause great damage your self-esteem and confidence.
• It can make you feel confused and very depressed.

You need to find out the root causes of why your marriage is now sexless when once it was probably loving, romantic and sexually fulfilling. It may be a physical problem in which case medical advice must be sought. If it is an emotional problem then some form of marriage counseling or other therapy is advisable. A sexless marriage because of physical problems is bad but one caused by emotional and psychological problems is equally as bad.

Possible causes for why a marriage is now sexless.

Here’s a few common reasons for why you might no longer feel sexually attracted to your partner:

• They have ‘let themselves go’ and are no longer physically attractive to you.
• They are emotionally cold and unfeeling towards you.
• They are dishonest and untruthful with you.
• They are lazy and selfish and generally unhelpful to you.
• They are abusive and disrespectful toward you.

Other reasons for your sexless marriage.

Your partner works long hours while you are ’stuck’ at home

When one partner is working very long hours and the other stays at home, feeling ignored and lonely it is very common for them to take out their frustrations on their partner by avoiding sex as a form of silent protest. This can become an entrenched attitude, which is hard to break when it has been happening for some time.

Both of you work long hours

When both you and your partner have very demanding and time-consuming careers you never seem get the chance to spend time with each other and behave like the proverbial ’ships that pass in the night’. The problem then is not one of loneliness and frustration for one of you but simply lack of time together which can cause you drift apart emotionally and sexually.

You need to decide what is more important, your marriage or your work and try to find some way of re-scheduling your lives so that you do not drift apart simply by not seeing each other enough.

Summary

There are many other reasons for a sexless marriage but any one of the above can cause you to avoid sex with your partner and create more problems in your marriage. If you do not tackle the problems in your sexless marriage then you may need to see a marriage counselor or therapist to help you solve them and stop your marriage from failing entirely. If you don’t then you could end up in the arms of someone nobody really likes… a divorce lawyer.

More help for a sexless marriage.

Ladies, help for a sexless marriage from a woman’s point of view can be found at: “Get Him In The Mood”

Anthony Bradley is a writer for http://saveyourmarriage.co.uk which has more information about sexless marriages. This original article is not to be reproduced without permission.